For I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in this flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me. -Galatians 2:20
But God, who is rich in mercy, because of His great love with which He loved us, even when we were dead in trespasses, made us alive together with Christ (by grace you have been saved), and raised us up together, and made us sit together in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, that in the ages to come He might show the exceeding riches of His grace in His kindness toward us in Christ Jesus. -Ephesians 2:4-7
Truly loving another means letting go of all expectations. It means full acceptance, even celebration of another’s personhood. -Karen Casey

People who suffer from amnesia usually don’t remember who they are. They may have problems remembering significant past events, places, and the people they knew, including their spouse, family, and friends.

Specialists say that to help the person heal and be restored, they must be shown love and patience in a secure environment of acceptance. Families can help by sharing treasured photographs, favorite foods, music, and familiar smells. Hypnosis can also help recall old memories that have been lost. All aid in finding the person’s identity, now locked within their brain due to trauma or other issue.

Answering the existential question “Who am I?” is similar. It’s as if we’ve lost the memory of who we are due to the trauma, pains, hurts, and disappointments of life. This is a frustrating and futile effort for most people. Desperately trying to answer the question while looking outward to temporal things of this world rather than inward to eternal things of spirit that never change.

Who am I?

Trying to answer this without a point of reference is hopeless. If I can’t find the origin of my existence, how will I know who I am today? I’m not talking about your birth parents, adopted parents, country of origin, native language, cultural affinities, DNA make-up, what you do for a living, your “success” or your “failures.” You’re so much more than those things!

We’re first and foremost a spirit. Unseen energy and life that’s one with Christ (I Corinthians 6:17). Spirit that expresses in a unique soul (your mind, will, and emotion) manifests through the body and interacts with others in this world of matter.

Your true self (identity) is in Christ Jesus. Ephesians 2:4-7 makes this clear, “But God, who is rich in mercy, because of His great love with which He loved us, even when we were dead in trespasses, made us alive together with Christ (by grace you have been saved), and raised us up together, and made us sit together in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, that in the ages to come He might show the exceeding riches of His grace in His kindness toward us in Christ Jesus.” Start with your origin in Christ, where God the Father put you from the eons of time past. Not because of your good works, but because you were and have always been loved unconditionally.

Who are you? You’re your Father’s son/daughter, one in Christ, loved, accepted, and embraced with great value! You always have been, and you always will be.

Nothing’s wrong with you

Many of us struggle with the feeling of shame that goes with the thought, “Something’s wrong with me.” The reason we struggle with the “Who am I?” question.

The good news is, nothing’s wrong with you. Nothing has ever been wrong with you. God created you as His masterpiece, not His mess-up. Genesis 1:26, 27a, 31a says, “So God created man in His own image; in the image of God, He created him; male and female He created them. Then God blessed them … Then God saw everything that He had made, and indeed it was very good.”

What’s wrong is our thinking and believing. If I believe the lie that something’s inherently wrong with me, then I will try to fix it or seek to build an identity that helps me feel better. But nothing outside yourself will help with the nagging feeling that something’s wrong.

No amount of success, achievement, money, relationships, religion, etc., can heal this wound. We can only be healed by embracing the reality of our union in Christ and the unconditional love of God that never ends.

Embracing unconditional love

God is unconditional love. That’s what agape is: loving people as they are, where they are each moment. There’s no agenda, no expectations, or manipulative tactics. Just a love that will never, ever let you go or leave you.

Christ exhibited this love most profoundly as He suffered and died for us. Such love caused the apostle Paul to embrace Christ fully, as we see in Galatians 2:20, “For I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in this flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me.”

Paul knew that God loved him and showed it by what He did, not just what He said. Christ also loved me and you and gave Himself for us. Agape love gives sacrificially and continues to give. Paul’s faith was not in his faith but in the faithfulness of Christ in union with Him.

Would you trust and embrace the faithfulness of Christ and His absolute unconditional love for you? If you’re still hesitant, here are a few things that might help:

Out loud, tell God you’re His child, embracing His unconditional love for you in Christ Jesus.
Thank Him that His love for you never changes, regardless of your behavior.
Then, out loud, agree with God that your identity is in your union with Christ and His finished work of extreme grace.
Thank Him that “something’s wrong with me” has NEVER been true of you and that you have always been everything your heavenly Father ever wanted.

I encourage you to participate in the reality of your union and oneness in Christ and the beauty of who you are each and every minute. Let His love overflow you. In time, that love will answer your “Who am I?” question.